You know me; I'm a sucker for heist movies since it usually shows how a well executed plan can come together to make a simple fetchquest all that more intricate.
Now when you make a heist film with a ton of Miyazaki magic, you get "Lupin III: The Castle of Cagliostro."
Technically a franchise film about an infamous gentleman thief and his crew (including the Interpol agent who hounds him), it is so full of the typical early Hayao Miyazaki flair, that it can be forgiven for little things like how Lupin and the female thief Fujiko know each other and who the random samurai wandering a European landscape is. Centers mainly around a counterfeiting ring of global proportions and of Lupin's brush with the small duchy of Cagliostro and how he intends to save the princess held against her will.
As things go south, and things look bleak, the man manages to find new ways to get out of scrapes and that's admirable.
The art is gorgeous, the action frenetic and fun (slapstick as only early anime and 'toons can give ya), and the characters are engaging and entertaining.
Enjoy the chase!
Not on this completely pointless list, but the spaghetti and meatballs from this film looked beyond scrumptious.
Another of my all-time favorite Chinese movies, "Driving Miss Wealthy," or the more accurate translation "The Best Filipino (Maid)," is one that can give you a bunch of gut-busting laughs.
A Hong Kong cop who takes any odd job he can is hired to pose as a Filipino chauffeur/bodyguard to look after the beyond-spoiled, highly-gullible daughter of a millionaire. Her father knows of her flaws and with the help of "Mario," he hatches a plan to pretend to be comatose, and leaving nothing to the daughter. This forces her to live in the slums with her very best Filipino manservant. The two learn to live together and work hard to get back on top. In addition to this tale of learning independence and hard work, it's a completely goofy love story.
The performance of the main character is the show stealer as he can effortlessly change his tone to heavily Tagalog accented Cantonese to his normal demeanor of no-nonsense bodyguard. While that may seem racist to some people, he does it with good taste and no negativity.
If you have a chance to watch it, highly recommend this rom-com of epic proportions.
Deadpool
"Wow, breaking the fourth wall while breaking the fourth wall. That's like... sixteen walls!"
With the exception of quite a few dramatic and/or romantic moments, "Deadpool" is a film with non-stop black comedy, 4th Wall breakings, and the deconstruction, calling out, & subtle jabs at the superhero movie genre.
Tons of fun (for those with a more twisted sense of fun), and the main character is VERY true to his comics counterpart, an antihero that revels in his powers, violence, and talkative loon status. In addition to being really funny, the action is well done and the emotional investment has its moments of getting the audience to actually care.
Of course, it is nowhere near the title of "the best superhero movie ever," but I expected nothing less for a film starring this ridiculous rogue.
Highly recommended to comic book and superhero movie fans...and just them. Don't bring the family along. Older or younger will not get a kick out of this.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer (complete with actual Ryan Reynolds voicework), go here.
For a more condensed and entertaining (spoiler-filled) review, go here.
Because I refuse to let this song die. 2012 wasn't that long ago!
Fury
"Fury" tells the same truth that's been told in so many war movies:
War is hell, but having comrades you can rely on makes it somewhat bearable.
Excellent action and all the horrors of World War II are brought to the forefront, but strangely enough meanders pointlessly around the middle just for a taste of "normalcy" and really, it dragged the movie down for what seemed like a mind-numbing 30 minutes or so. Best scene of course, is the climax with the main cast having to survive an indefensible crossroads in a glorious last stand in an immobile tank.
Recommended.
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| Actually no. The men involved were very smart and stayed IN the tank for the most part. |
Burnt
"If you have one Michelin Star, you're Luke Skywalker. If you have two, you're whoever Alec Guiness was. If you have three, you're Yoda."
"But what if he's Darth Vader?"
When a disgraced rock star tries to break back into the scene, do we want him to succeed? Hellz yeah. We want to believe that crippling setbacks can be overcome, and that we can get back into the game like nothing ever happened.
That's "Burnt" in a nutshell.
Bradley Cooper plays a chef who had too much success too early and after a self-imposed exile, goes to London to try to achieve his 3rd Michelin Star. After assembling his crack team of specialists, he seems to be all set to take the culinary world by storm. The only problem is...he's more Gordon Ramsay than Gordon Ramsay. In his striving for perfection in his restaurant, he isolates himself and his attempts to interact with regular humanity is stilted.
Can he overcome all these hangups and earn Jedi Mastery?
Overall, great film with Cooper playing simultaneously the fiercest oni and the warmest captain of the cooking ship.
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| Having never eaten anything cooked with the "sous vide" method, I really didn't understand this movie's...BEEF with this process. |
So vengeful spirits that haunt you from beyond the grave? Let's see, there's Sadako from "the Ring," Kayako from "the Grudge," not counting Ryan Reynolds in "RIPD," and joining their ranks is Leonardo DiCaprio in "the Revenant."
This Oscar-winning performance has Leonardo DiCaprio face the harshness of the wilderness after being left for dead by his fur-trapping buddies after getting attacked by Native Americans. He was left intentionally dead by new Mad Max since that guy's character is truly despicable, confirmed at the point where he kills he kid who plays DiCaprio's son. And even after all the trials consisting of snow-covered mountains, amoral Frenchmen, and perilous falls, he goes on the roaring rampage of revenge against the Bane of his existence.
Don't lose your waaaaaaaay!
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
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| Because if they didn't give him an Oscar for his performance in the Revenant, he would've surely killed himself in his next movie to achieve it...seriously, the man suffered hard for his artsy movie. |
Well Pixar ol boy, you raised my hopes with "Inside Out" and you made me cry with "The Good Dinosaur" and not in a good way!
Well, give Pixar some props for making the first Western set before the idea of cowboys or horses, giving us a fuly Western atmosphere through sprawling landscapes and an almost "Magnificent Seven" score. In a funny twist, it is reminiscent of another Pixar movie, "Brave." What "Brave" accomplished with hair, "The Good Dinosaur" accomplished with beautiful landscapes, given that both are feats in animation. Also taking pages from the playbook of "Brave," the story and plot are pretty much two other Disney properties mashed together; while "Brave" is essentially "Brother Bear" meets "Freaky Friday" and set in Scotland, "the Good Dinosaur" tries its hand at being a mish-mash of "the Lion King" and "Finding Nemo" set in the prehistoric frontier. It is slightly darker in tone as well, with essentially cultist pterodactyls that demand sacrifice, Native American Styrcosaurus who might have ingested one too many natural hallucinogenic substances, our two protagonists tripping out on their own hallucinogenic substances, and Sam Elliot as a cattle-herding T-Rex who has to ferociously fight cattle-rustling velociraptors,
But despite all this madness, there is a certain charm that I'm sure will be some 6 year old's gateway into dinosaur love as it was for somebody of the previous generation and "Land Before Time."
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| As we all know, Disney is no stranger to having their character undergo the most disorienting of delusions. |
For movies like "the Intern" you wonder just how well do the scriptwriters understand real life. Unless the actual old people in their lives are as genuine, heartfelt, and cool as Robert DeNiro plays his character, I do believe they're never really met an average senior citizen before.
Trying to fill a void in his life, Robert DeNiro's character becomes an intern for an e-shopping business, reporting directly to the workaholic boss, played by Anne Hathaway, and eventually reaches a point where he becomes her most trusted advisor in matters both personal and professional.
Really nice story and just seeing how DeNiro's godfatherly, old-school charm has positive impact on everyone at the workplace.
Zootopia
"Who's your friend who makes you laugh and cry?"
DIS-NEY! DIS-NEY!
"Who's the best with talking animals?"
DIS-NEY! DIS-NEY!
"Who has the best voice-acting casts?"
DIS-NEY! DIS-NEY!
"Zootopia" is the new amazing film from Disney animation and as is typical of their films of late, it is full of top-notch animation, fantastic voice-acting cast, intriguing story, and unbelievably human characters (even though, they are, in fact, all animals).
The two main leads are the best guides to this incredible world, the optimistic and high-energy bunny cop voiced by Ginnifer Goodwin and the ever-hustling, fast-talking fox voiced by Jason Bateman. Judy the bunny is a great determinator character and doesn't let anything get her down, and Nick the fox is another lovable rogue in the same vein as Aladdin and Flynn Rider. As they solve the mystery plaguing the city, we also dig into their pasts and motivations as well as enjoy the antics of the creature-themed city and animal inhabitants around them.
What's even more fascinating is that the movie seems to take our current world drama about racism and turn it into a child-friendly, colorful, easy-to-digest story with the morals being two-fold: love your neighbor and try to be more than you are.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
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| So after being one of the protagonists of the most successful Disney movies ever (Frozen), what else does she do for the Mouse? Be a her most favorite animal ever. No really guys, she LOVES SLOTHS! |
When you push past the crude sex, drugs, alcohol, and other bodily functions jokes in "Neighbors," it's actually the tale of two new parents, played by Seth Rogan and Rose Byrne, who think they can reconnect with their wild and crazy glory days when a the house next door becomes a fraternity house, but upon the realization that this party life ain't for them anymore, come up with ingenious ways to fight to take back their tranquility and mundane lives. At the same time, the fraternity, led by Zac Efron and Dave Franco, have their ultimate goal of being the wildest partyers tested when confronted with their own looming future of adulthood and the prospect of growing old and boring like their neighbors.
TL;DR clash of clashes between two parties whose very way of life is threatened by the other...in suburbia.
The Jungle Book (2016)
In the grand total of 3 direct Disney adaptations of their own animated features (4 if your count Maleficent), Jon Favreau's "The Jungle Book" has surpassed my expectations and made the story pretty darn amazing.
The characters are all pretty much spot-on, with their celebrity voice-overs doing them great justice (of note, Ben Kingsley playing the commanding protector and Bill Murray being the lovable slacker with a good heart), and some characters have even been improved upon, notable amongst them being the wolf pack family and Mowgli himself. In this version, he's not so much the Load, the one to be rescued CONSTANTLY; instead, they made him the innovator, the bucker of tradition, and pretty much leagues more capable than previously thought possible. Another interesting twist on a familiar character is King Louie, or should I say Don Louie. Complete with his new gangster persona is his new standing as a mythical, huge hulking ape instead of a jive-talkin' orangutan.
Behind the story we all know is this interesting, strangely political power balance trying to be achieved, with Shere Khan exerting a tyrannical dominance over all the jungle creatures, despite logic dictating that the majority of these creatures, having human-like intelligence, should be able to fight back against one hateful, racist tiger. And not until Mowgli, trying to find his place in the world, realizes where his responsibilities and home really lie, becomes an unlikely, unwilling figurehead of the rebellion against angry, stripey kitty.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
HILARIOUS reference to the fact that Christopher Walken voices King Louie
Sherlock: The Abominable Bride
Dunno if it really counts as a movie, but "Sherlock: the Abominable
Bride" sure felt like one. Finally putting them Baker Street Boys in
their proper time period, they try to solve a mystery of a vengeful
ghost lady, but is she really? And is everything as it seems?
Great acting, lots of great set pieces and costumes, turning our modern crime drama back into the period piece it's supposed to be, fascinating story, and just references to the classic works of Arthur Conan Doyle make it a grand ol' mega episode.
Gods of Egypt
Oh lawd above..."Gods of Egypt" was a marvelous and spectacular piece of crap.
If I were to explain a film's plot badly, it would sound a little too much like the Lion King...except that Scar, as played by Gerard Butler, went and disfigured Simba, who has to regain his honor and retake the throne after some time away from the kingdom, Timon is trying to save the soul of his dead lover, and...Rafiki as played by Geoffrey Rush, is on a river boat in space, trailing the sun behind him and fending off Galactus/Parallax from devouring his discworld.
While the plot is cliche, the characters ridiculously 2 dimensional, the effects laughably cheesy, the lines very cringeworthy, and the actor chemistry being nonexistent, it is a fantastic (albeit stupid as all heck) take on the weirdness of the Ancient Egyptian mythology. Save this one for a bad movie night.
X-Men Apocalypse
"If we can agree on one thing, the 3rd film is always the worst." - Jean Grey, in this movie speaking the truth.
While this isn't a strictly the third film, "X-men Apocalypse" is the 3rd time they've used the cast from the prequels, so I'm counting it as a trilogy. While the first movie had compelling characters, an interesting setting in both time and environment, and the most bromantic Xavier and Magneto have ever been, the 2nd movie gave us characterization in spades, decent action, beloved actors, and crisscrossing the timestreams for great effect. This one...gave us a Quicksilver scene that completely trumped the previous one, because he's saving people all over the X-mansion to the sweet techno sound of Eurythmics' Sweet Dreams...
Now You See Me 2
When the hustlers get hustled by Harry Potter of all people, you know that this film might be a bit ridiculous.
"Now You See Me 2" gives us our previous pretentious titled Robin-Hood-MO stage magicians, the Horsemen, featuring Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Dave Franco, and peppy newcomer to supplant that redhead lass, Lizzy Caplan, in a bit of hot water, landing them in Macau. It's up to the uneasy alliance of Mark Ruffalo and Morgan Freeman, especially since we see some of their sordid history this time around, to help them out, especially after a high-stakes heist befitting their elaborate and elegant trickery.
Divergent
Since "Divergent" put almost no effort into crafting an original story, characters, romantic subplot, dystopian future, nor tired YA novel series adaptation cliches, I shall only do the same and yoink from more creative descriptive minds than me:
Basically, caste system, specialized roles, a couple of chosen ones to fight the system, yadda-yadda-yadda.
Insurgent
So as much as I picked on "Divergent" for having no differences from other YA adaptations with a dystopian future and categorizations and stuff, it wasn't until "Insurgent" that I realized in what way it actually differs:
There is a HUGE emphasis on "Matrix"/"Inception" dream sequences / trip out delusions.
So a little step forward in making themselves at least more stunning visually than its previous film, but still not enough to make me enjoy the character or half-assed plot points.
Also, hi Wally West. Who knew you would pop up here before you even get your superspeed debut?
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2
In another great instance of the trailers being completely misleading, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2" is NOT about the underage girl finding a nice Greek boy to marry and make Greek babies with.
Of the three major conflicts of the film, the biggest deal is allocated to Grandpa, who finds out, in his research for lawyer-friendly ancestry.com, that he was never legally married. So in addition to our main gal's daughter choosing to leave her crazy family to study elsewhere and the problem-solving Toula having to learn to let go of her family's issues and just be herself, it becomes a big ol buildup to the big fat Greek wedding of the elderly.
Really fun, wacky antics of so many crazy relatives, and super relatable to anyone who comes from a culture with a big emphasis on family.
Allegiant
"I guess it IS shocking to me. Shocking that the more I learn about the past, I feel like you're making the same mistakes over and over again," - Triss, talking about this movie?
With "Divergent" being a shameless ripoff of more popular films of the genre, and "Insurgent" being a little better since we get some character development and more emphasis on dream diving, where does "Allegiant" stand?
A big ol' frog's leap backwards.
We are given the same "don't trust the people in charge because they loco" song and dance from the new people in charge, we get the same Reed Richards betrays everyone brouhaha that worked SO VERY WELL the last couple times, the main protagonists are in the same kinda pickle that requires the other to valiantly unpickle them, and, of course, not a satisfying conclusion at all.
Good grief, somebody really needs to put this franchise out of their misery...how about you Netflix or Hulu?
Free State of Jones
Who remembers "Defiance?" The movie that features James Bond and (a) Sabertooth saving Jews during World War II by hiding out in a forest?
That's essentially what "The Free State of Jones" is.
Matthew McConaughey stars as the man who got fed up with the Confederate side during the end part of the American Civil War, and after going home, finds that the Confederate soldiers stationed there are worse than the people he's been fighting. Thus, he rebels even further and is hunted down. After taking refuge with some escaped slaves, he builds a community that defends themselves in a swamp, consisting of other Confederate deserters and more escaped slaves. Together, white and black, man and woman, fight as equals to defend themselves and what is rightfully theirs.
While this is a great premise upon itself, that's only the first half...the 2nd half is a lot more of a downer as McConaughey takes up the burden of helping the black population grow from being slaves to US citizens...a burden as anybody who paid attention in history class, and even paying attention to the current news, is an ongoing struggle.
A bit disjointed in its storytelling, but kind of makes up for it with the phenomenal acting and the grit & determination displayed by the characters.
Ghostbusters
Trepidation, cautious optimism, and just the loud wondering if whether or not the same lightning can be caught in a bottle were all reactions to when people saw the trailer.
Or in this case, the same ghosts of good feelings can be caught in the ghost trap.
I refer to it as Gal(!)Ghostbusters, but the powers that be simply call it "Ghostbusters," and while it is a fun ride and not what I would call a "love letter" (More like the rough draft of a note of longing you tape/magnet to a crush's locker), I cannot say it is better than the original.
While the first one's humor rests more solidly on deadpan delivery, quotable lines, and characters being lovably cuckoo, this version has a lot of times where the camera would just rest on the ladies and let them be their funny selves and ramble. The characters themselves are pretty much their actors with a few tweaks, with the exception of Kate Mckinnon who fully becomes an eccentric mad scientist with an almost permanent grin and larger than life attitude.
I'll have to credit this in the same way that I credited "Dawn of Justice" for being kind enough to resort to callbacks and references to the previous incarnation of the Paranormal Sentai Ghostbusters, but all in all that's just a cheap tactic for making weak movies seem strong. Overall, it's pretty much got the same blood running through its veins as "The Force Awakens" with it basically rehashing the first film to play it safe and to ease us into our familiar yet all-new surroundings, but with enough visual flair and "interesting" characters to be entertaining.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
Zoolander No. 2
The first "Zoolander" can best be summed up as "an absurdist comedy that still maintains the human element"
So when they make "Zoolander2," do we get more of what made the first one great even after all the jokes should be stale and tired?
Yes, yes we do.
But are the jokes stale and tired? I don't think so!
We are given the same Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller wacky chemistry, the same kind of mispronunciation gags, more completely out-of-left-field celebrity cameos, the continuation of nonsequiter scenes that just make you go "whaaaaaaat," further ridiculous conspiracies about the fashion industry, and yet again, Will Ferrell felt like taking crazy pills.
But as the first time was so bizarre and nonsensical in a good way, more of the same, with different situations and contexts, is greatly appreciated. It's exactly what you expect from a continuation of the chronicles of the bizarro world where really really really ridiculously good-looking people are so hot right now.
Jason Bourne
Let's talk about "shaky cam," the style of cinematography where you try to convey more action and "realism" by NEVER holding the camera still. The "Bourne" series of films have been called out on this seemingly major irritant to enjoyable viewing, but I must admit that it never bothered me before.
"Jason Bourne" however, has made me re-evaluate my position on this.
Roughly 80% of the movie is shot with the cameraman seeming to go through withdrawal symptoms. And I think I was able to forgive the shaky cam in the past because the action scenes were fast-paced, action-filled, and edited well enough for me to overlook it. Not so now since so much of the movie was just following people down hallways, streets, or other places on the way to the action. Build up to action scenes is a fine tactic, but when it drags on too long, there is no way the action scene will be mind-boggling enough to justify the slog.
And the story? What story? Most I could get was just that it was trying to be relevant because technology spying on us or something?
Suicide Squad
Having read a sparse amount of Suicide Squad, Secret 6, and other anti-hero/primarily-villains-you're-supposed-to-root-for teams by the fine people at DC, I already knew what the fundamental problem of "Suicide Squad" was going to be...they're touted as "bad guys" (and the movie will remind you of that CON-STANT-LY) but lo and behold, we sympathize with, enjoy watching, and ultimately WANT the "bad guys" to win.
Quite frankly, I don't believe anyone can be 100% a dick, but they sure did a poor job of establishing why the audience should feel aghast at any of their actions, even with gratuitous, quick-edited, and color-filled backstories for 3 of the 7 squad members.
So along with the mixed messages of how to feel about the characters, the best would have to be their boss, Amanda Waller (non-fat version) as played by Viola Davis. Having only seen one episode of "How to get away with Murder," I can only conclude that Viola is playing this role as an amped-up version of the teacher from that show. Manipulative, cold, and completely ruthless in her dealings with all living souls.
And based on my own predictions of the movie, it was way off. Tharja from Fire Emblem Awakening summoning an evil army of liquid tar people and a swirling vortex of terror and lightning to take over the world was a far cry from what most people were hoping for, that after a warm-up act with the magical lady of doom, that they'll focus on attacking the Joker. The Joker himself, hyped as he was for being such a radically different take on the Jokers we're used to seeing, became no more than a glorified cameo with some plot significance...like Wonder Woman in "Dawn of Justice."
Enjoyable, with (relatively) likable characters, and a most basic story...unlike the previous two DC movies, which gave us enjoyable, but with majority unlikable characters and convoluted-to-the-point-of-disgust plots.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here and here.
Batman: Attack on Arkham
In the continuing trend of WB animation churning out a better quality movie than the live-action blokes, "Attack on Arkham" is the superior Suicide Squad movie.
Whilst the live-action version seemed to think that what this movie needed was honor amongst thieves and camraderie out of nowhere, we rarely get that in the animated version, the closest we get to them actually coming together is several instances of watching each other's backs between the beast and the (ice-cold) beauty, and Harley & Deadshot having a romp in the sheets. The rest of the time, it's a lot of backstabbing, double crossing, differences in ideologies, snark at their teammates' expense, and a whole host of other issues you get when you force DANGEROUS CRIMINALS into a group situation for a goal that they all can't agree on.
Plus, the threat is much more manageable for characters of their caliber: sneak into the loony bin, steal a thing, cause tons of havoc, and leave, hopefully without inciting the wrath of the Bat or the Clown (didn't work). Much better setup than "save the world from crazy Ancient Mayan belly-dancer."
But the biggest saving grace of the animated movie? PEOPLE ACTUALLY DIE! I can't believe I'm saying this about a group of people I'm supposed to root for, but when you want the bad guys stopped, you want them taken out. Kill count for Suicide Squad: 2/9. Kill count for Attack on Arkham: 4/7
If you want to introduce yourself to what the Suicide Squad is all about, do yourself a favor and watch this movie before you see the one where they're all ohana.
What's this? An Ip Man movie without the classification of any one race as inherently a-holes? Miracles!
"Ip Man 3" continues the story of the man with the fast fists and the calmest disposition who fights the power. In the first film, he fought the Japanese. In the 2nd, he fought the British. In this one, he fights organized crime as they set out to terrorize his son's school.
While that might seem like a downgrade, I do enjoy that the bad guys are bad guys; simple as that. And the end-fight between their boss, played by Mike Tyson trying his darnedest to make his Cantonese sound rethpectable, and our hero is truly amazing, bringing the previous boxer vs martial artist fight in the 2nd film to shame.
As always though, it's not just about fantastic fights, but it's also about Man learning how to be more of a caring family man, and being (even more) warmer towards his fellow man. All culminating in his final fight not actually being for national pride nor survival, but more of a friendly (but still intense) bout between two practitioners of the same style, departing not as enemies but as respected martial artists.
Also, young Bruce Lee stand-in is hilarious in all his attempts to channel the spirit of the legend.
Storks
As far as movie plots go, how much more nonsensical can you get than forming a world around the collective tall-tale of squeamish parents who don't want to explain what's the real deal about the stuff between your legs?
"Storks" may lack an engaging plot and any semblance of common sense in this mad mad mad world, but it is truly a cartoon in all sense of the word, comparable to the energy, delivery, and straight up comedy gold to stuff like Chuck Jones and Genndy Tartakovsky. The characters are all amazingly funny (except one little weirdo who every time he appeared on screen just made things awkward and sucked me out of the movie), with the two main leads supplying most of the humor, essentially turning this movie into a most delightfully zany adventure with Andy Samberg and Pinkie Pie.
It's not purely a barrel of laughs though. There is a a center of heartfeltness and unbearable cuteness, and it balances out this film fairly well.
Overall, I am starting to believe in Warner Bros Animation again. To further emphasize their new masterful handle on animation and humor, they included a short in front of this movie "built" in the same vein as the LEGO Movie. Watch this movie if you want to laugh.
Chef
Having only seen Jon Favreau's acting chops through his depiction of Tony Stark's bumbling bodyguard/driver, I didn't know what to expect out of "Chef."
Thankfully, he delivers with a performance full of passion and heart.
Favreau stars as a chef at the end of his rope in almost every aspect of his life, but after a turnaround, he finds a way to make food he wants, be his own boss, and bond with his young son: have his own food truck. What follows is the journey of a man across the country, picking up local flavors and establishing precious memories with his boy.
Each of Favreau's friends, notable stars like Robert Downey Jr, Scarlett Johanson, and John Leguizamo, churn out good performances and give you believable characters. But the real star is the scrumptious-looking food as it's prepared and as it's served. Just try not feeling hungry after seeing the man prepare a Cuban sandwich of dreams.
Tropic Thunder
Truly a film for movie lovers, "Tropic Thunder" brings the laughs at this ridiculous behind-the-scenes look at the struggle of making a movie when everyone has issues. Deep and thoroughly insane issues.
All the actors are phenomenal to watch, including by far one of the most convoluted performances by Robert Downey Jr. and the most entertainingly obnoxoious, foul-mouthed, and belligerent cameo from Tom Cruise.
Watch this if you're in for a laugh at the expense of the movie industry.
Hellboy
I always found the phrase "better the devil you know than the devil you don't" a little bit weird because who wants to be familiar with a demon?
Well, if he's Ron Perlman depicting a stereotypical red devil (complete with horns and a tail) but who also thinks muttonchops works well with Japanese man-bun and has a soft spot for kitties and pancakes? Hell yeah, "Hellboy" is the demon to know.
Brought about by wacky Nazis tampering with the natural order, but taken in by a kind American paranormal expert, this monstrous figure is part of a secret government agency that deals with the otherwordly entities way out of the jurisdiction of the Men in Black and the Ghostbusters. His latest adventure involves foiling an evil plot by a steampunk cyborg Nazi ninja and Rasputin himself because nobody wants hellhounds and lawyer-friendly Eldritch abominations around right?
At times, this Guillermo del Toro flick has all his trademarks of edgy, creepy but not gross, tendency to use practical and CG effects, and lots of visual flair during action scenes, but at other times, the acting is a little stilted and you're only drawn in by how good the visuals are. But then again, I was never a fan of the art style of the graphic novels made famous by Mike Mignola, so as far as direct translations goes, it made it look much better.
Watch it if you're feeling like seeing how the things that go bump in the night get bumped back by a giant stone fist.
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children
So what happens when you throw in a heaping helping of X-men, add a little bit of Percy Jackson, put in a dash of Groundhog Day, toss in some horrific Slenderman aesthetic to the villains, and marinate it all in Tim Burton's brain?
"Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children."
An interesting tale of how an ordinary sixteen-year old finds how his grandfather used to be involved with a bunch of mutant children and their Time Lord/Animorph headmistress, and how this Ender becomes integral in their struggle against invisible tentacle monsters led by Samuel L. Jackson.
Fascinating adaptation and full of Tim Burton flavor. The best thing though? It doesn't BEG for a sequel, but gently raises its hand asking the masses for a new chance in the future.
Star Trek Beyond
Say what you will about the JJ Abrams vision of Star Trek, it's definitely full of excitement.
This is fully embodied in "Star Trek Beyond," where they got the director of the Fast and the Furious movies to give us some of the best action featuring the crew of the Enterprise.
The trade-off is that despite each of the main crew members getting their time to shine onscreen, the characterization is not as strong as the previous movies which really dug into the characters' essence. (well, main characters of Kirk and Spock) Little bits of growth, and it's more in the Scotty department with his 2nd assistant/potential love interest of Jayla, the lone badass survivor on a hostile planet, which only makes sense since Simon Pegg was one of the brilliant minds who had a hand in crafting this movie as well.
Overall, another grad adventure in space and in a foreign planet, meeting new people, finding new (old) technology, and letting their characters shine in these predicaments.
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Have you ever seen those people who bring animals onto the late night talk shows and are clearly more at ease being with animals than with people, and will excitedly tell you that the potentially dangerous creatures they have brought with them are actually wonderful and amazing and you should love them?
Eddie Redmayne in "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them."
While he's not the most charismatic character in this movie, his love for the wondrous CG animals is almost infectious, almost to the point of Steve Irwin levels.
What could've been simply an amazing film about a wizard in New York City during the Roaring 20s doing his best to keep his world-class menagerie contained is elevated even further with a tale about neo-witch burners, a dangerous force never before explored in the wizarding world, an evil warlock's machinations behind the scenes, and the zoologist and his new friends getting caught up along in the maelstrom.
Great story, imagination beyond compare, and acting that's pretty good, if not a little stiff and wooden at first.
Highly recommend especially if you like critters of all shapes, sizes, and temperaments.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
Moana
If there's one thing we can rely on Disney for, it's bringing its special lens of storytelling onto different parts of the world and making movie magic.
Now that lens has turned to the Pacific Islands and some of its myths and legends, and we get "Moana" (Or "Moana: Densetsu no Umi" or "Vaiana" in certain parts of Europe).
This is movie has the hallmarks of all the great Disney classics of the past, while making things cool to look at with modern technology. The main character herself is like a proper fusion of Mulan, Merida, and Ariel's character, and while seeming familiar in those ways, she has her own way of being herself, and that makes her a great addition to the long list of Disney leading ladies. The 2nd protagonist Maui, is Dwayne Johnson performing in a way akin to the spirit of Robin Williams' Genie but also adding the facets of grumpiness and massive ego to this gem of a character.
Despite the songs being penned by one of the great up&coming Broadway musical songwriters, something about the music is holding me back from enjoying them completely. While lyrical, catchy, and using the native instruments to add great atmosphere to the movie, none of the songs really seem to stick with me. With the exception of Moana's "I want" song being a great anthem for the character and the actress giving it her all vocally, I don't know if any of these will have the same hummable quality as stuff done in the Lion King, Aladdin, or Tangled (so thankfully, no endless spamming of another "Let it go"). Overall, if you're a Disney fan, this will be another enjoyable adventure brought to you by the Mouse. To which I'm pretty sure he'll simply say, "you're welcome."
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
"I am one with the Force, the Force is with me."
"Just because I cannot see it, doesn't mean I can't believe it."
- both dudes who dress in black & white
"Rogue One" is the prequel to Star Wars we've all been waiting for. The cast gives us much more diversity in that Galaxy Far Far Away than simply 'Mericans (&Brits?) and Aliens. Action packed, well acted, and a story that is leagues above any ol' rehashing of a familiar script.
The only gripe I have is that it is super hard to remember the characters' names; I only referred to them as their archetypes: protagonist girl, spy guy, blind kung-fu master, gun guy, the pilot, and the robot.
Apologies if this is short, but to reveal any more will be super spoiler stuff.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
The Magnificent Seven (2016)
Sometimes when a remake rolls around, what is usually expected that if nothing else, the visuals and the action are improved from the original. This is exactly the case for the 2016 version of "The Magnificent Seven."
Plot's the same really; banditos, nay hired white mercenaries under the bidding of a robber baron, besiege a simple town, and the townsfolk find themselves saviors. What DID change however was the diversity of the cast. In comparison to the original, they still gave us accomplished gunslingers, but now their job classes range from bounty hunter to religious-minded hermit and gambler played by Chris Pratt to...Chinese ninja played by a Korean?
All in all, this update gives us exactly what we expected out of a classic Western, but with much more modern action sensibilities.
So skip that game of Bang! and check out this star-studded shoot-em-up.
Great acting, lots of great set pieces and costumes, turning our modern crime drama back into the period piece it's supposed to be, fascinating story, and just references to the classic works of Arthur Conan Doyle make it a grand ol' mega episode.
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| Funnily enough, I was able to deduce how the Abominable Bride was able to ghost her way around because of an old episode of "Magic School Bus" that explained this old stage trick. |
Oh lawd above..."Gods of Egypt" was a marvelous and spectacular piece of crap.
If I were to explain a film's plot badly, it would sound a little too much like the Lion King...except that Scar, as played by Gerard Butler, went and disfigured Simba, who has to regain his honor and retake the throne after some time away from the kingdom, Timon is trying to save the soul of his dead lover, and...Rafiki as played by Geoffrey Rush, is on a river boat in space, trailing the sun behind him and fending off Galactus/Parallax from devouring his discworld.
While the plot is cliche, the characters ridiculously 2 dimensional, the effects laughably cheesy, the lines very cringeworthy, and the actor chemistry being nonexistent, it is a fantastic (albeit stupid as all heck) take on the weirdness of the Ancient Egyptian mythology. Save this one for a bad movie night.
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| When Captain Barbossa finds another boat to commandeer, he saves us all! |
"If we can agree on one thing, the 3rd film is always the worst." - Jean Grey, in this movie speaking the truth.
While this isn't a strictly the third film, "X-men Apocalypse" is the 3rd time they've used the cast from the prequels, so I'm counting it as a trilogy. While the first movie had compelling characters, an interesting setting in both time and environment, and the most bromantic Xavier and Magneto have ever been, the 2nd movie gave us characterization in spades, decent action, beloved actors, and crisscrossing the timestreams for great effect. This one...gave us a Quicksilver scene that completely trumped the previous one, because he's saving people all over the X-mansion to the sweet techno sound of Eurythmics' Sweet Dreams...
When an ancient evil is unleashed upon the world in the 80s, we get to
see our favorite Mutants (yes the favs, not like the ragtag bunch in
First Class) band together for the first time to take down the Mutant
delusional enough to believe he's a god and with the hax&OP powers
to back up that claim.
While I mentioned that Days of Future Past had so much character building, this one wasn't devoid of it either, most noticeable in the scenes with Magneto and with the newbies. And while the action and effects are decent, there really isn't anything outstanding. The best thing about this would probably that they're finally getting the look of the Xmen right, giving us the best costumes of the entire spectrum of Xmen movies.
Highly enjoyable but it succumbs to the same problem of "Kung-fu Panda 3": after getting blown away by the 2nd installment, and the 3rd installment just leaves you feeling not as fulfilled, you tend to feel like it was worse than it was.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.While I mentioned that Days of Future Past had so much character building, this one wasn't devoid of it either, most noticeable in the scenes with Magneto and with the newbies. And while the action and effects are decent, there really isn't anything outstanding. The best thing about this would probably that they're finally getting the look of the Xmen right, giving us the best costumes of the entire spectrum of Xmen movies.
Highly enjoyable but it succumbs to the same problem of "Kung-fu Panda 3": after getting blown away by the 2nd installment, and the 3rd installment just leaves you feeling not as fulfilled, you tend to feel like it was worse than it was.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
I bet my inhuman love for cats counts as a mutation.
When the hustlers get hustled by Harry Potter of all people, you know that this film might be a bit ridiculous.
"Now You See Me 2" gives us our previous pretentious titled Robin-Hood-MO stage magicians, the Horsemen, featuring Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Dave Franco, and peppy newcomer to supplant that redhead lass, Lizzy Caplan, in a bit of hot water, landing them in Macau. It's up to the uneasy alliance of Mark Ruffalo and Morgan Freeman, especially since we see some of their sordid history this time around, to help them out, especially after a high-stakes heist befitting their elaborate and elegant trickery.
The funny thing
about this film is that it reels you in exactly in the same manner as
the magicians these actors play, giving you a sense of mystery that you
MUST keep on watching or else you'll miss something, or you go in hoping
that their explanation won't leave you feeling completely stupid. And
while the plot is fairly standard and the characters are more outrageous
caricatures, you can't help but feel reeled in with the most burning of
questions...is magic real here?
And despite Daniel Radcliffe being in this movie, he's strangely enough more of a tech wizard than a traditional wand-waving one.
And despite Daniel Radcliffe being in this movie, he's strangely enough more of a tech wizard than a traditional wand-waving one.
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| Oh yeah. Jay Chou is in this movie too in a completely forgettable, blink-and-you'll-miss-him, role as a magic shopkeeper's grandson. |
Divergent
Since "Divergent" put almost no effort into crafting an original story, characters, romantic subplot, dystopian future, nor tired YA novel series adaptation cliches, I shall only do the same and yoink from more creative descriptive minds than me:
Insurgent
So as much as I picked on "Divergent" for having no differences from other YA adaptations with a dystopian future and categorizations and stuff, it wasn't until "Insurgent" that I realized in what way it actually differs:
There is a HUGE emphasis on "Matrix"/"Inception" dream sequences / trip out delusions.
So a little step forward in making themselves at least more stunning visually than its previous film, but still not enough to make me enjoy the character or half-assed plot points.
Also, hi Wally West. Who knew you would pop up here before you even get your superspeed debut?
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2
In another great instance of the trailers being completely misleading, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2" is NOT about the underage girl finding a nice Greek boy to marry and make Greek babies with.
Of the three major conflicts of the film, the biggest deal is allocated to Grandpa, who finds out, in his research for lawyer-friendly ancestry.com, that he was never legally married. So in addition to our main gal's daughter choosing to leave her crazy family to study elsewhere and the problem-solving Toula having to learn to let go of her family's issues and just be herself, it becomes a big ol buildup to the big fat Greek wedding of the elderly.
Really fun, wacky antics of so many crazy relatives, and super relatable to anyone who comes from a culture with a big emphasis on family.
Allegiant
"I guess it IS shocking to me. Shocking that the more I learn about the past, I feel like you're making the same mistakes over and over again," - Triss, talking about this movie?
With "Divergent" being a shameless ripoff of more popular films of the genre, and "Insurgent" being a little better since we get some character development and more emphasis on dream diving, where does "Allegiant" stand?
A big ol' frog's leap backwards.
We are given the same "don't trust the people in charge because they loco" song and dance from the new people in charge, we get the same Reed Richards betrays everyone brouhaha that worked SO VERY WELL the last couple times, the main protagonists are in the same kinda pickle that requires the other to valiantly unpickle them, and, of course, not a satisfying conclusion at all.
Good grief, somebody really needs to put this franchise out of their misery...how about you Netflix or Hulu?
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| Surely it's a red flag when one of these people is in charge of the whole scientific experiment society thing. |
Who remembers "Defiance?" The movie that features James Bond and (a) Sabertooth saving Jews during World War II by hiding out in a forest?
That's essentially what "The Free State of Jones" is.
Matthew McConaughey stars as the man who got fed up with the Confederate side during the end part of the American Civil War, and after going home, finds that the Confederate soldiers stationed there are worse than the people he's been fighting. Thus, he rebels even further and is hunted down. After taking refuge with some escaped slaves, he builds a community that defends themselves in a swamp, consisting of other Confederate deserters and more escaped slaves. Together, white and black, man and woman, fight as equals to defend themselves and what is rightfully theirs.
While this is a great premise upon itself, that's only the first half...the 2nd half is a lot more of a downer as McConaughey takes up the burden of helping the black population grow from being slaves to US citizens...a burden as anybody who paid attention in history class, and even paying attention to the current news, is an ongoing struggle.
A bit disjointed in its storytelling, but kind of makes up for it with the phenomenal acting and the grit & determination displayed by the characters.
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| Now just imagine what would've happened if Matthew McConaughey was replaced with Mike Myers. |
Ghostbusters
Trepidation, cautious optimism, and just the loud wondering if whether or not the same lightning can be caught in a bottle were all reactions to when people saw the trailer.
Or in this case, the same ghosts of good feelings can be caught in the ghost trap.
I refer to it as Gal(!)Ghostbusters, but the powers that be simply call it "Ghostbusters," and while it is a fun ride and not what I would call a "love letter" (More like the rough draft of a note of longing you tape/magnet to a crush's locker), I cannot say it is better than the original.
While the first one's humor rests more solidly on deadpan delivery, quotable lines, and characters being lovably cuckoo, this version has a lot of times where the camera would just rest on the ladies and let them be their funny selves and ramble. The characters themselves are pretty much their actors with a few tweaks, with the exception of Kate Mckinnon who fully becomes an eccentric mad scientist with an almost permanent grin and larger than life attitude.
I'll have to credit this in the same way that I credited "Dawn of Justice" for being kind enough to resort to callbacks and references to the previous incarnation of the Paranormal Sentai Ghostbusters, but all in all that's just a cheap tactic for making weak movies seem strong. Overall, it's pretty much got the same blood running through its veins as "The Force Awakens" with it basically rehashing the first film to play it safe and to ease us into our familiar yet all-new surroundings, but with enough visual flair and "interesting" characters to be entertaining.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
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| The rationale behind making the Ghostbusters into gals. Who was the original ghost hunter? Pacman. What did Namco do to keep the game going even though nothing about it changed? Woman. |
The first "Zoolander" can best be summed up as "an absurdist comedy that still maintains the human element"
So when they make "Zoolander2," do we get more of what made the first one great even after all the jokes should be stale and tired?
Yes, yes we do.
But are the jokes stale and tired? I don't think so!
We are given the same Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller wacky chemistry, the same kind of mispronunciation gags, more completely out-of-left-field celebrity cameos, the continuation of nonsequiter scenes that just make you go "whaaaaaaat," further ridiculous conspiracies about the fashion industry, and yet again, Will Ferrell felt like taking crazy pills.
But as the first time was so bizarre and nonsensical in a good way, more of the same, with different situations and contexts, is greatly appreciated. It's exactly what you expect from a continuation of the chronicles of the bizarro world where really really really ridiculously good-looking people are so hot right now.
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| This movie teaches us that apparently if enough people do the Blue Steel look, telekinesis spontaneously happens. |
Let's talk about "shaky cam," the style of cinematography where you try to convey more action and "realism" by NEVER holding the camera still. The "Bourne" series of films have been called out on this seemingly major irritant to enjoyable viewing, but I must admit that it never bothered me before.
"Jason Bourne" however, has made me re-evaluate my position on this.
Roughly 80% of the movie is shot with the cameraman seeming to go through withdrawal symptoms. And I think I was able to forgive the shaky cam in the past because the action scenes were fast-paced, action-filled, and edited well enough for me to overlook it. Not so now since so much of the movie was just following people down hallways, streets, or other places on the way to the action. Build up to action scenes is a fine tactic, but when it drags on too long, there is no way the action scene will be mind-boggling enough to justify the slog.
And the story? What story? Most I could get was just that it was trying to be relevant because technology spying on us or something?
Suicide Squad
Having read a sparse amount of Suicide Squad, Secret 6, and other anti-hero/primarily-villains-you're-supposed-to-root-for teams by the fine people at DC, I already knew what the fundamental problem of "Suicide Squad" was going to be...they're touted as "bad guys" (and the movie will remind you of that CON-STANT-LY) but lo and behold, we sympathize with, enjoy watching, and ultimately WANT the "bad guys" to win.
Quite frankly, I don't believe anyone can be 100% a dick, but they sure did a poor job of establishing why the audience should feel aghast at any of their actions, even with gratuitous, quick-edited, and color-filled backstories for 3 of the 7 squad members.
So along with the mixed messages of how to feel about the characters, the best would have to be their boss, Amanda Waller (non-fat version) as played by Viola Davis. Having only seen one episode of "How to get away with Murder," I can only conclude that Viola is playing this role as an amped-up version of the teacher from that show. Manipulative, cold, and completely ruthless in her dealings with all living souls.
And based on my own predictions of the movie, it was way off. Tharja from Fire Emblem Awakening summoning an evil army of liquid tar people and a swirling vortex of terror and lightning to take over the world was a far cry from what most people were hoping for, that after a warm-up act with the magical lady of doom, that they'll focus on attacking the Joker. The Joker himself, hyped as he was for being such a radically different take on the Jokers we're used to seeing, became no more than a glorified cameo with some plot significance...like Wonder Woman in "Dawn of Justice."
Enjoyable, with (relatively) likable characters, and a most basic story...unlike the previous two DC movies, which gave us enjoyable, but with majority unlikable characters and convoluted-to-the-point-of-disgust plots.
For funny yet spoilery synopsis disguised as a trailer, go here.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here and here.
Not a bad guess; and there really was such a petty request from an inmate.
Batman: Attack on Arkham
In the continuing trend of WB animation churning out a better quality movie than the live-action blokes, "Attack on Arkham" is the superior Suicide Squad movie.
Whilst the live-action version seemed to think that what this movie needed was honor amongst thieves and camraderie out of nowhere, we rarely get that in the animated version, the closest we get to them actually coming together is several instances of watching each other's backs between the beast and the (ice-cold) beauty, and Harley & Deadshot having a romp in the sheets. The rest of the time, it's a lot of backstabbing, double crossing, differences in ideologies, snark at their teammates' expense, and a whole host of other issues you get when you force DANGEROUS CRIMINALS into a group situation for a goal that they all can't agree on.
Plus, the threat is much more manageable for characters of their caliber: sneak into the loony bin, steal a thing, cause tons of havoc, and leave, hopefully without inciting the wrath of the Bat or the Clown (didn't work). Much better setup than "save the world from crazy Ancient Mayan belly-dancer."
But the biggest saving grace of the animated movie? PEOPLE ACTUALLY DIE! I can't believe I'm saying this about a group of people I'm supposed to root for, but when you want the bad guys stopped, you want them taken out. Kill count for Suicide Squad: 2/9. Kill count for Attack on Arkham: 4/7
If you want to introduce yourself to what the Suicide Squad is all about, do yourself a favor and watch this movie before you see the one where they're all ohana.
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| It's funny because Harley kept calling Deadshot "cowboy" and even though this version isn't even remotely close to resembling Will Smith, parallel was made in my mind. ^0^ |
Kubo and the Two Strings
For too long the name Kubo has been associated with the hack who came up with the manga series "Bleach," but now, the public consciousness will thankfully be talking about a better Kubo.
"Kubo and the Two Strings" has the hallmarks of many a great Japanese myth, a simple hero, accompanied by fantastical creatures, goes on an epic fetchquest to vanquish the monsters that have taken so much from him. But the funny thing is, it's a wholly original idea, from the same folks who made stop-motion classics, such as "Coraline." Not only is the artistry of the film a gorgeous marvel, but the characters and story are phenomenal, full of laughs, tragedies, and humanity, as evidenced by the amazing voice-acting work and creativity in the settings and lore.
Definitely a must-see if you're a fan of the best kind of puppet shows.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
Ip Man 3For too long the name Kubo has been associated with the hack who came up with the manga series "Bleach," but now, the public consciousness will thankfully be talking about a better Kubo.
"Kubo and the Two Strings" has the hallmarks of many a great Japanese myth, a simple hero, accompanied by fantastical creatures, goes on an epic fetchquest to vanquish the monsters that have taken so much from him. But the funny thing is, it's a wholly original idea, from the same folks who made stop-motion classics, such as "Coraline." Not only is the artistry of the film a gorgeous marvel, but the characters and story are phenomenal, full of laughs, tragedies, and humanity, as evidenced by the amazing voice-acting work and creativity in the settings and lore.
Definitely a must-see if you're a fan of the best kind of puppet shows.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
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| Fire breathing chicken from Japan? Where have I seen that one before... |
What's this? An Ip Man movie without the classification of any one race as inherently a-holes? Miracles!
"Ip Man 3" continues the story of the man with the fast fists and the calmest disposition who fights the power. In the first film, he fought the Japanese. In the 2nd, he fought the British. In this one, he fights organized crime as they set out to terrorize his son's school.
While that might seem like a downgrade, I do enjoy that the bad guys are bad guys; simple as that. And the end-fight between their boss, played by Mike Tyson trying his darnedest to make his Cantonese sound rethpectable, and our hero is truly amazing, bringing the previous boxer vs martial artist fight in the 2nd film to shame.
As always though, it's not just about fantastic fights, but it's also about Man learning how to be more of a caring family man, and being (even more) warmer towards his fellow man. All culminating in his final fight not actually being for national pride nor survival, but more of a friendly (but still intense) bout between two practitioners of the same style, departing not as enemies but as respected martial artists.
Also, young Bruce Lee stand-in is hilarious in all his attempts to channel the spirit of the legend.
Storks
As far as movie plots go, how much more nonsensical can you get than forming a world around the collective tall-tale of squeamish parents who don't want to explain what's the real deal about the stuff between your legs?
"Storks" may lack an engaging plot and any semblance of common sense in this mad mad mad world, but it is truly a cartoon in all sense of the word, comparable to the energy, delivery, and straight up comedy gold to stuff like Chuck Jones and Genndy Tartakovsky. The characters are all amazingly funny (except one little weirdo who every time he appeared on screen just made things awkward and sucked me out of the movie), with the two main leads supplying most of the humor, essentially turning this movie into a most delightfully zany adventure with Andy Samberg and Pinkie Pie.
It's not purely a barrel of laughs though. There is a a center of heartfeltness and unbearable cuteness, and it balances out this film fairly well.
Overall, I am starting to believe in Warner Bros Animation again. To further emphasize their new masterful handle on animation and humor, they included a short in front of this movie "built" in the same vein as the LEGO Movie. Watch this movie if you want to laugh.
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| So this movie basically depicted wolves the same way that "Finding Nemo" showed us how moonfish swarming worked. |
Having only seen Jon Favreau's acting chops through his depiction of Tony Stark's bumbling bodyguard/driver, I didn't know what to expect out of "Chef."
Thankfully, he delivers with a performance full of passion and heart.
Favreau stars as a chef at the end of his rope in almost every aspect of his life, but after a turnaround, he finds a way to make food he wants, be his own boss, and bond with his young son: have his own food truck. What follows is the journey of a man across the country, picking up local flavors and establishing precious memories with his boy.
Each of Favreau's friends, notable stars like Robert Downey Jr, Scarlett Johanson, and John Leguizamo, churn out good performances and give you believable characters. But the real star is the scrumptious-looking food as it's prepared and as it's served. Just try not feeling hungry after seeing the man prepare a Cuban sandwich of dreams.
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| It sure ain't that simple...you need a sandwich press too! |
Truly a film for movie lovers, "Tropic Thunder" brings the laughs at this ridiculous behind-the-scenes look at the struggle of making a movie when everyone has issues. Deep and thoroughly insane issues.
All the actors are phenomenal to watch, including by far one of the most convoluted performances by Robert Downey Jr. and the most entertainingly obnoxoious, foul-mouthed, and belligerent cameo from Tom Cruise.
Watch this if you're in for a laugh at the expense of the movie industry.
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| If you give Jack Black enough cocaine, marvelous things will happen. |
I always found the phrase "better the devil you know than the devil you don't" a little bit weird because who wants to be familiar with a demon?
Well, if he's Ron Perlman depicting a stereotypical red devil (complete with horns and a tail) but who also thinks muttonchops works well with Japanese man-bun and has a soft spot for kitties and pancakes? Hell yeah, "Hellboy" is the demon to know.
Brought about by wacky Nazis tampering with the natural order, but taken in by a kind American paranormal expert, this monstrous figure is part of a secret government agency that deals with the otherwordly entities way out of the jurisdiction of the Men in Black and the Ghostbusters. His latest adventure involves foiling an evil plot by a steampunk cyborg Nazi ninja and Rasputin himself because nobody wants hellhounds and lawyer-friendly Eldritch abominations around right?
At times, this Guillermo del Toro flick has all his trademarks of edgy, creepy but not gross, tendency to use practical and CG effects, and lots of visual flair during action scenes, but at other times, the acting is a little stilted and you're only drawn in by how good the visuals are. But then again, I was never a fan of the art style of the graphic novels made famous by Mike Mignola, so as far as direct translations goes, it made it look much better.
Watch it if you're feeling like seeing how the things that go bump in the night get bumped back by a giant stone fist.
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children
So what happens when you throw in a heaping helping of X-men, add a little bit of Percy Jackson, put in a dash of Groundhog Day, toss in some horrific Slenderman aesthetic to the villains, and marinate it all in Tim Burton's brain?
"Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children."
An interesting tale of how an ordinary sixteen-year old finds how his grandfather used to be involved with a bunch of mutant children and their Time Lord/Animorph headmistress, and how this Ender becomes integral in their struggle against invisible tentacle monsters led by Samuel L. Jackson.
Fascinating adaptation and full of Tim Burton flavor. The best thing though? It doesn't BEG for a sequel, but gently raises its hand asking the masses for a new chance in the future.
Scary Samuel L. Jackson transforms from scary to
SCARIER!!
Star Trek Beyond
Say what you will about the JJ Abrams vision of Star Trek, it's definitely full of excitement.
This is fully embodied in "Star Trek Beyond," where they got the director of the Fast and the Furious movies to give us some of the best action featuring the crew of the Enterprise.
The trade-off is that despite each of the main crew members getting their time to shine onscreen, the characterization is not as strong as the previous movies which really dug into the characters' essence. (well, main characters of Kirk and Spock) Little bits of growth, and it's more in the Scotty department with his 2nd assistant/potential love interest of Jayla, the lone badass survivor on a hostile planet, which only makes sense since Simon Pegg was one of the brilliant minds who had a hand in crafting this movie as well.
Overall, another grad adventure in space and in a foreign planet, meeting new people, finding new (old) technology, and letting their characters shine in these predicaments.
And the moral of this story? When confronted with a killer swarm from beyond the stars, YOU SHOW THEM THE POWER OF ROCK!
Have you ever seen those people who bring animals onto the late night talk shows and are clearly more at ease being with animals than with people, and will excitedly tell you that the potentially dangerous creatures they have brought with them are actually wonderful and amazing and you should love them?
Eddie Redmayne in "Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them."
While he's not the most charismatic character in this movie, his love for the wondrous CG animals is almost infectious, almost to the point of Steve Irwin levels.
What could've been simply an amazing film about a wizard in New York City during the Roaring 20s doing his best to keep his world-class menagerie contained is elevated even further with a tale about neo-witch burners, a dangerous force never before explored in the wizarding world, an evil warlock's machinations behind the scenes, and the zoologist and his new friends getting caught up along in the maelstrom.
Great story, imagination beyond compare, and acting that's pretty good, if not a little stiff and wooden at first.
Highly recommend especially if you like critters of all shapes, sizes, and temperaments.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
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| Behold, the most famous Hufflepuff of all...yes even moreso than that kid who turned into a vampire. |
If there's one thing we can rely on Disney for, it's bringing its special lens of storytelling onto different parts of the world and making movie magic.
Now that lens has turned to the Pacific Islands and some of its myths and legends, and we get "Moana" (Or "Moana: Densetsu no Umi" or "Vaiana" in certain parts of Europe).
This is movie has the hallmarks of all the great Disney classics of the past, while making things cool to look at with modern technology. The main character herself is like a proper fusion of Mulan, Merida, and Ariel's character, and while seeming familiar in those ways, she has her own way of being herself, and that makes her a great addition to the long list of Disney leading ladies. The 2nd protagonist Maui, is Dwayne Johnson performing in a way akin to the spirit of Robin Williams' Genie but also adding the facets of grumpiness and massive ego to this gem of a character.
Despite the songs being penned by one of the great up&coming Broadway musical songwriters, something about the music is holding me back from enjoying them completely. While lyrical, catchy, and using the native instruments to add great atmosphere to the movie, none of the songs really seem to stick with me. With the exception of Moana's "I want" song being a great anthem for the character and the actress giving it her all vocally, I don't know if any of these will have the same hummable quality as stuff done in the Lion King, Aladdin, or Tangled (so thankfully, no endless spamming of another "Let it go"). Overall, if you're a Disney fan, this will be another enjoyable adventure brought to you by the Mouse. To which I'm pretty sure he'll simply say, "you're welcome."
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| So this is all it takes to have the Ocean choose you as its agent of change. Just imagine! "My name is Stitch, from the island of Kauai. You will board my boat (draws guns) or else!" |
"I am one with the Force, the Force is with me."
"Just because I cannot see it, doesn't mean I can't believe it."
- both dudes who dress in black & white
"Rogue One" is the prequel to Star Wars we've all been waiting for. The cast gives us much more diversity in that Galaxy Far Far Away than simply 'Mericans (&Brits?) and Aliens. Action packed, well acted, and a story that is leagues above any ol' rehashing of a familiar script.
The only gripe I have is that it is super hard to remember the characters' names; I only referred to them as their archetypes: protagonist girl, spy guy, blind kung-fu master, gun guy, the pilot, and the robot.
Apologies if this is short, but to reveal any more will be super spoiler stuff.
For a creative overview from a fellow movie-reviewing friend that lists three pros and three cons, please go here.
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| When you have Alan Tudyk voicing a character, reference to past roles MUST be made. |
The Magnificent Seven (2016)
Sometimes when a remake rolls around, what is usually expected that if nothing else, the visuals and the action are improved from the original. This is exactly the case for the 2016 version of "The Magnificent Seven."
Plot's the same really; banditos, nay hired white mercenaries under the bidding of a robber baron, besiege a simple town, and the townsfolk find themselves saviors. What DID change however was the diversity of the cast. In comparison to the original, they still gave us accomplished gunslingers, but now their job classes range from bounty hunter to religious-minded hermit and gambler played by Chris Pratt to...Chinese ninja played by a Korean?
All in all, this update gives us exactly what we expected out of a classic Western, but with much more modern action sensibilities.
So skip that game of Bang! and check out this star-studded shoot-em-up.
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| For all those decrying Hollywood for being bereft of ideas, plz. That's been going on since Moses was a baby. |
